If you like me, are always scouting ways to supplement your income, I’ve got some inspiration for you from Kemi – my very own egbon mil’ekoni Baltimore. She’s only two-ish years older than me, but she’s like my mini mama because ori won wanbe…too much wisdom in her head.
I woke up on Friday to see a bunch of posts on my Instagram timeline with hashtag #istandwithbusola. My heart started to race a bit faster as I read to find out Busola Dakolo had released an interview where she confessed that Pastor Biodun Fatoyinbo of COZA church allegedly raped her twice at age 17. If you know us Nigerians, you know we neither sleep nor slumber, and as I expected, the Naija community was all over social media to put our full ignorance on display.
Do you have that one random thing that you really want to do, but have held back doing for whatever reason? You’re not alone. There are 6 things that I really want to do, but somehow, I have not done them, and I really don’t know if I ever will. I think my reasons are legitimate, but I’ll let you be the judge when you see my list. Let’s dive right in.
Iya ‘Riyike is 56 years old and has had a catering business in Nigeria for 25 years. What started out as a small gig out of her kitchen on random weekends here and there has grown to employ twelve full time staff. Now she gets tons of bookings several months in advance for corporate and owanbesocial events.
Now that we have two very young kids, going out on a date night with Oko mi is almost like preparing to run a marathon. First, we gotta start planning like one whole year in advance for someone to watch the kids. Then we have to pray that on the actual day, we are not so exhausted, that we’d rather take a nap than go out (yes, we’ve done this before, don’t ask). For our 6-year wedding anniversary, a dear friend was gracious enough to watch the kids, while we went out to dine at Swahili Village, a Kenyan restaurant located in Beltsville, MD.
If you don’t know what a typical African mother is like, think Iya Tiwa from Skinny Girl in Transit. African mothers are popularly known for over-reacting to even the minutest situations. Just let your African mother find your “#dead” comment on social media, and you’ll get a phone call right away, with her yelling at the top of her voice, “you will not die in Jesus’ name!” Push it too far by posting a picture of you in a strapless dress, and it’s wrap; your African mother will call you, threatening to have a heart attack, saying “o fe pa mi ni?”
Don’t be fooled though, African mothers are our biggest supporters, and that’s why we love them like kilode?Let’s not get started on their banging meals; even iya basira cannot compete with my mom’s catfish stew.
It’s almost summer, which means wedding season is upon us! Who doesn’t love the celebration of love, and of course, the added bonus of party jollof and small chops?appetizers As much as we love weddings, there are some ridiculousness that interfere with our excitement for them. Dear bride and groom (and the wedding party), before we start booking our makeup and geleNigerian head gear for your wedding, please promise us that you won’t be guilty any of the following seven offenses.
Have you ever been to a Nigerian embassy? Or ordered clothes from designers tailors in Nigeria, because #buynigerian? Or have you been to a post office in Nigeria? Notice what these places/events have in common? People in “important” positions, who have something you want. The little authority they are given has so gotten into their heads, that they don’t know how to act anymore. I call that the nigerianism attitude.